Ninety Seconds of Light: Working It All Out

It was still dark outside when the alarm went off. I despise waking up to an alarm clock. Oh how sweet it will be when I can sleep until my eyes just pop open all on their own, fully rested and ready for the day. Those days are far from my present reality so I reached over and hit the snooze button. I’ve calculated exactly how many times I can hit snooze into my wake up time, the thought of a few extra minutes of sleep helps me to cope with the early hour.

Anyway, I woke up to the blaring alarm, hit snooze and rolled over dreading what was next. You see, I started a workout routine in the early morning hour to help me combat the aging process. I have found that my muscles are turning to jell-o these days and I am on a campaign to slow down the process. The only real time I have available right now is five AM. I know, right? That is so early and it is still dark out and I’m tired and the covers are so warm and yes, I’m whining.

After hitting snooze a couple of times I perched myself on the side of the bed and allowed my body to acclimate to the upright position. I didn’t sit too long as I am on a tight schedule to get it all done and get out the door to work. I quickly changed into my lycra workout apparel and wiped my wild bed hair out of my face. I’m so glad none of you are able to see exactly what I look like by the time I am ready to press play on the DVD player.

It’s not pretty. I’ll just leave that image up to your imagination.

By the time I hit the play button and Chalene begins her perky warm up segment, I am somewhat coherent and probably a little in denial about what I am about to do. I remind myself repeatedly that I will love myself for this when I am done. But, while I am turning myself into a human pretzel and listening to her remind me that I could do more if I tried harder, all I want to do is go back to bed or cry. Or both.

I want to quit.

I’m no rookie to workout videos or early mornings. I’ve started more fitness routines than I care to admit and stopped short of completing most every time. But, this time I am determined to finish the one hundred and twenty day plan.   I am on a mission to defy gravity or at the very least slow it down, and I desperately want to finish what I’ve started here. My goal is really not to be skinny or look like a body builder, I am very realistic about my limitations. I just want to keep improving and not to give up. I’m tired of being a quitter.

I want to be a “follow through-er.” (Is that a real phrase? I think I just made it up, oh well, you get the idea.)

I’ve quit a whole lot of things in my life and the older I get the more determined I become to hang in there and finish. Just finish. I could think of a thousand reasons not to get out of bed early tomorrow morning, but I am going to. As long as I am well and able, I will finish this period of exercise and hopefully see some results.

This is exactly what I’ve decided about my relationship with Jesus. I am going to go all the way with this thing. You know what I mean?   I’m not giving up on Him and me. I am going to get out of bed each day and face it knowing that He is within me reminding me that I can do it and I am not alone. Hopefully by the time my days on earth are over I will be able to look back and see a difference. My spiritual self will be stronger because I made the daily decision to allow him to make me tougher and more mature through spiritual exercise.

Allowing Him to turn me into a pretzel on the inside so I can see some results.

As they say, no pain, no gain. (That expression makes me kind of scared inside.)

Well, I plan to wake up tomorrow and get to work, physically and spiritually. As a matter of fact, I need to go to bed now because Chalene, my cyber trainer, will be as perky as ever at five AM.

Lord, help.


Prayer: Father, you know I have struggled with quitting in my life, especially when things get too hard. Help me, encourage me and train me to be a finisher. To run my race of life and finish the course with good results at the end. I need your strength because I have already proven that I am weak on my own. When it gets nearly unbearable, teach me to dig deeper inside and hang in there, the difficulty won’t last forever. And one day, when I get to heaven, I will rejoice in knowing that I finished what I started. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture: “Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:12-14

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